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Saturday, September 4, 2021

How To Please Your Husband In Words, Sexually & Otherwise

 A lady contacted me a long time ago for counsel on how to please her man. According to her, the husband is always displeased and unappreciative despite all she does to make him happy. She doesn't understand that there are critical things men desire in a woman besides beauty and sex.

How to please your husband

Situations like this is not peculiar to this young lady. Many people even suffer worse cases. Every now and then, the burden of many wives is on new ways to please their husbands. Often, the commonest questions asked are; 

  • “How can I satisfy my husband emotionally?”
  •  “How can I attract my husband physically?” 

more seriously, some ask;

  •  “How can I make my husband feel special?” 

This has become huge stress on women. No woman wants to lose a husband to another woman for the simple reason of dissatisfaction and discontentment.

In case you are a victim of such a situation, your lucky day has come. This post will teach you how to please your husband sexually, in words and even more than you bargained for.




You can never be able to fully please a man until you understand men’s greatest need or desire in life. Many women think that as long as they are in shape, pretty and sexually powerful, a man is pleased. It is a huge mistake to think this way. He can find women who are prettier and more romantic than you.

 Even though men have high sexual desires and are sight-driven, more than these, their greatest need is RESPECT. That is why God emphatically commanded that women should respect their husbands. It gives them a sense of significance and control.

In my many years of experience, I have come to realize that a wife who pleases her husband in words is likely to easily please him in every other area. Moreover, one way to build, restore and sustain intimacy in marriage is through positive and kind words.

With these said, what is the sweetest thing to say to your husband to make him happy? How can you make your husband feel special with words?

Here are a few tips below;


I realize that one major reason for intimacy issues in a marriage is FAMILIARITY. When a wife becomes so used to her husband that she neglects some basic marriage protocols like positive words and affirmations the relationship is in danger. 

For most women, the only time they say, “thank you my dearest love” is when they are gifted with something. But they never cease insulting and cussing when their needs are not met.

 Many wives don’t even know how to send forth and receive in their husbands from work. The man comes in after a long workday and they can’t see that he needs sweet words and encouragement. Most women will instead, bring up their own issues and needs. How insensitive. A man’s allegiance lies with a woman who knows how to massage his ego. He likes it when you make him feel important through verbal expression and gestures.

The worst thing a woman can do to a man is making him feel less of himself and this is generally in two ways;

  • By using unappreciative or unkind words and
  • By not saying anything at all making him feel he is doing nothing

To please a husband with words and attract him physically, I suggest using the following statement:

1. In The Morning Before He Goes For Work

  • My love, Indeed you are a great husband and a real father. I admire your courage that you always wake up very early every day for work despite the inconveniences just so you can provide for the family. Seriously I and the kids deeply appreciate all you do. Not many husbands act this way.
  • Hey sweet, I just want to say you are my ideal man. I really enjoyed the sex and sweet romance last night. Do come back home quickly. Don’t let me miss you too much.



2. In The Evening When He’s Back From Work

  • How was your day at the office today? You looked so famished when you came in. Is there anything you want me to do to help you relax and feel better?  I could massage you, you know.
  • Welcome my king. I miss you so much. Guess what? I made your favourite meal and I want to be the one to feed you tonight.



Solomon in his teaching of wisdom in Proverbs 15:1 has this to say to especially married folks, “A soft answer turneth away wrath: but grievous words stir up anger.”

How do you respond to a husband who is angry over an issue? I understand that sometimes it could be his fault yet he blames you and refuses to critically analyze the situation. But what do you do in such a situation? I know It is easier to calm down and not react when it is obvious you are the faulty one, but when you are being blamed for what you are innocent about, it takes God’s grace not to pick offence and respond harshly. This is why God wants us to always use soft words.

Soft or pleasant words are used amidst a heated atmosphere that suggests quarrels and anger to calm the tension and make the atmosphere safe and more comfortable for meaningful communication.

 A wise wife is the one who looks past the wrong accusations and uses soft words instead.  When the atmosphere is safe, then she can seek to clarify things and make the man see reasons with her.

On the other hand, if a man is shouted at through hard and unpleasant words, he feels disrespected. This alone can stir up anger and wrath which could lead to things like domestic abuse, malice, constant quarrels. By this time, you have already lost the opportunity to satisfy your husband emotionally. The question of how a woman can satisfy her husband would be absolutely unnecessary at this point.




Another way to make a husband feel special is by pleasing him in bed. A woman who knows how to please her husband in the bedroom will always be valued, appreciated and respected. By pleasing a husband in the bedroom, I mean pleasing him in bed sexually.

The first question to ask before pleasing anybody is what actually pleases them and how do they like to be pleased. In a similar vein, you have to be abreast with what makes men happy sexually and how they like it done to them. This is the foundation for how to attract your husband physically.

There are many advantages of pleases a husband sexually. First, you will have a certain influence on his life. A man who is sexually satisfied can do a lot of things for a woman. Second, it reduces the possibility of infidelity. Third, it makes him happy and satisfied and always eager to come home after work. This is just to mention a few.

Below are few ways to meet a husband sexual need in bed;


In my years of escapades with different women before I became a Christian, I realize that one mistake many women make is leaving sexual activities during sex to the man alone. Somehow women nurse this funny idea that it is a man’s responsibility to satisfy them whether he himself is satisfied or not. This is why many husbands go home to satisfy their wives and go out to satisfy themselves with another woman.

To please your husband in bed, the first step is to find his soft spot. By this, I mean, knowing what really twinkle his fancy during lovemaking and this is done by critical observation.  Don’t be so carried away that you forget to take note of details during sex. There are places men like to be touched and things they enjoy when done to them during sex.

Most men love when you gently caress their nipples. For some, the way you romantically look into their eyes help them enjoy sex better. Some need to hear that sweet, gentle sound you make. While a lot of others like it when you give them blowjobs in between sex. Whatever the case is, you have to observe a man’s reaction during lovemaking to be able to discern.


A certain woman felt the husband disturbs her for sex a lot. As a way to scare him, she left her vagina unwashed for days. At night when the man came, as usual, seeking sex, she opened it wide and the odour that oozed out stunk to the point it scared the man away and his libido melted instantly.

Many women may not be intentional like this woman, but whether intentional or not, a man will not always be willing to have sex with a dirty wife. To make matters worse, he may not be able to muster enough courage to even tell the wife for fear of embarrassment. Sometimes he makes up another reason for not being happy and the ignorant wife is there doing nothing.

Being unclean can result in a lot of things like cheating, nagging, dissatisfaction, resentment and despise.



You heard me right. Serve peace before sex.

Many women ask, “How can I satisfy my husband sexually?” I think this is not the right question to ask. Instead, ask, “How can I satisfy my husband emotionally?” When a husband is satisfied emotionally, he can easily be satisfied sexually. Much more than sex, a man wants a woman who can give him peace of mind. It takes a relaxed and peaceful heart to enjoy sex. You don’t quarrel and abuse him today and makeup with sex tomorrow and expect him to be happy.   



It is true that men are self-starters. They are the ones who mostly initiate sex by making the move for it. But sometimes, a husband will appreciate it if you initiate sex. A man can be sexually aroused naturally, but they can also be aroused artificially and that is your responsibility.

To please your husband, you have to also learn how to arouse his sexual desire. There are many ways to do this. First ensure you have sexy and revealing clothes put on, then walk up to him, sit on his lap and kiss him. Tell him how sexy and sweet he looks and how you want to give it to him so hard. Kiss him, softly slick your hands inside his pants and rob your breast on his face while romancing him physically.




 A man’s ideal wife is a reserved-in-public-but-naughty-in-bed kind of woman. As long as you are married, God wants you to enjoy sex so feel free to do it naughty. In my post 6 types of sex your spouse deeply desires but won’t tell you, I enumerated the different types of sex couples are not leveraging on. To please a man sexually, you may want to check it out.

To do sex dirty, you have to know what a man’s fantasy is and try to help him achieve it. Does he like it in the bathroom, kitchen or sitting room? Does he enjoy oral sex? Does he like when you do the sexing sometimes? Does he like it hard or soft? When it comes to sex, make sure there are no reservations. Ensure you help him enjoy sex to the fullest.



Many wives want to satisfy their husbands sexually but are not willing to pay the sacrifice. Sex is a hard job and so demands some level of selflessness and sacrifice.

Every man has a sex position they prefer to others. Some don’t even cum until you are in that position. The common positions are doggy and missionary, legs on shoulder, reverse cowgirl etc. You probably know better than I do. 

I agree some positions are very painful for the woman, but whatever it is; you have to learn to find a way around it. It is better to take the pain and satisfy a man than to lose him to another who is willing to take the pain. One thing about sex position is that no matter how painful penetration can be in that position, after a while, it will begin to ease up.


A husband does not joke with a wife who knows her way with words. One very good place to use words of positive affirmations is during sex. A woman who appreciates her husband for sexually satisfying her is likely to have enough of him. Yet this is one area many wives miss. There is nothing to be ashamed about. Words like;

  • “I feel so satisfied whenever you make love to me”
  • “You are really great in bed”
  • “Whenever you making love to me I always wish it never came to an end”
  • “I would have missed a lot sexually if I wasn’t married to you.”


This way, you not only satisfy him sexually but emotionally too.



What is your tone during sex? Do you just shout like an animal or do you sound gentle, soft and sexy? Your tone has a lot to communicate to a man during sex. Whether it is painful or not or whether you are climaxing or not, you have to learn how to make sexy tones while making love. Many men like this. They want to know that they are making you enjoy sex and the only way to is through the sound you make and the affirmations you give. Silence during sex annoys a man. It makes him feel he is not man enough. A nice tone during lovemaking is one of the best ways to please a man sexually. 




Isn’t it strange that many people are not ashamed when having sex but are too ashamed to discuss their sex lives? This is insane. Why would you marry someone you are ashamed of in the first place? The success of a relationship such as marriage is built on the solid rock of openness, honesty and trust.

As a woman, if you must please your husband sexually you have to improve your sex life and that begins with knowing what and what not to improve about sex. This is where sex evaluation comes in. a woman should never be ashamed to ask questions like;

  • What do you want me to begin doing to improve our sex life?
  • Frankly tell, what about sex with me that you don’t like?
  • What can I do to attract and arouse you physically?
  • What do you enjoy most in sex?

With all these done, your are right on your way to pleases your husband. 



100 Questions MARRIED COUPLES Should & Should Never Ask Each Other

100 Questions To Build Intimacy Fast When It’s Totally Dead.


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