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Saturday, September 25, 2021

7 Easy Ways To Naturally Avoid Sexual Temptation In A Relationship


Many years ago a certain young man I mentored confided in me," I really want to, but I find it hard to avoid sexual temptation in any relationship I enter into." He continued, " fornication is destroying me gradually and I can't seem to end it. Please how can I kill this overwhelming longing for sex?"

Is this not the fate of many young chaps out there? A desire to overcome sexual frustrations that stare at us everywhere we turn. With the immodest manner young girls dress nowadays, fighting sexual temptation becomes even more difficult for men.

How to resist the urge for sex

Good news, the things I recommended for this young man that helped him suppress his sexual desire naturally are the same things I have put together for you as well. Make sure you patiently read to the end because temptations of sex are not a joke. To have self-control sexually is to win in many other areas of life.


Many people especially Christians want to get married in an honorable way, which means overcoming sexual temptation before marriage. Unfortunately, this goal can't be achieved unless we fully grasp what the causes of sexual desires are and how to deal with them completely.

Some of the major causes of sexual temptations are:

Our natural drive for sex: We were wired for sex. But if sex must happen, the biological systems responsible to stimulate our desire must be activated. But this is not an excuse to indulge in sexual immorality. God gave us this natural longing for sex, but not without the ability to control it. SEX was created for man and not man for SEX, so we are more powerful than sex. 

Our natural drive to have sex can be triggered by a lot of things: the nude content we see, the images we form in our imagination, the thoughts we cultivate, and the things we hear. 

When we can't control some of these things and our spouses are not close by to quench our need for sex and romance, or when they are not willing to, we become tempted to make love to other people other than our spouse. This is the reason I made the post, " 7 easy ways to keep you and your spouse from cheating"


There are many reasons lovers give in to premarital sex in a relationship. In learning how to get rid of sexual desires, we must know what these reasons are and how to deal with them the best way we can.

A common misconception many people hold is that sexual desire is a sin and a sickness we must all strive to fix. As a result, we hear of those who take artificial medications that can help end their sexual longing.

This is a myth and a deadly misconception. It is a breach of God's creativity and wisdom. He designed sex for our pleasure amidst other reasons. Though we are tempted to have sex whether as singles or married, there are ways to suppress our sexual desires naturally. That way is what we will see shortly.


The first step to overcome sexual frustrations in a relationship is to be self-aware.

Self-awareness in this case involves understanding your sexuality and sexual sensitivity. Though we were created by the same God, we were created similarly and differently. These differences largely cut across our biological makeups which include our sex hormones that propagate our sexual drives. This is the reason most people have a strong desire for sex, hence their quest for help with sexual longing. Whereas, others have low drives.

With this at the back of your mind, to effectively deal with sexual temptation in any kind of relationship, you must become abreast with your level of desire so you will know the things that easily trigger your mood for sex and stay off them.


Understanding the perks and pitfalls of anything helps in the effective management of that thing. As Myles Munroe said, " when the purpose of a thing is not known, abuse is inevitable." This is why another way to avoid sexual temptation in a relationship is to understand the pros and cons of sex.

Sex is a sweet and beautiful gift to mankind, however, it does not have any pros or advantages outside the premise of marriage. This is why we must avoid it. Premarital sex has done a lot of damage to great men and women in history. There are those who died as a result of sex, some suffer the attack of deadly STDs, many young girls and guys with great and promising futures are school dropouts today, some have even become sworn enemies with someone else all because of sex.

My question now is, " would you want to be enlisted amongst the victim of sex or would you rather fight hard to decrease your sexual desire?"


Finding help with sexual desires also entails understanding what sex and love actually mean. Often times we've heard women say things like, " It wasn't my intention to have sex with him. I just wanted to express my love for him. He said if I love him, I should have sex with him."  

Hear this, sex is not and can never be an expression of true love. If you truly love someone, the best you can do for that person is abstain from premarital sex. You actually hate yourself and the one you make love to out of wedlock.

One profound way to reduce sexual desire is not to be in any relationship with someone who forces you to have sex with him/her all in the name of " if you love me, have sex with me." When next they say that, tell them I love you enough to have sex with you. If they still push, muster enough courage to push emotions aside and walk out of the relationship.


If you are the kind of person who has high sexual urge and drive, this point is especially for you. Setting boundaries that you determine to comply with is another way to help suppress sexual desires naturally. You don't have to take any form of unnatural medication to help inhibit your libido. This is against the natural way of minimizing sexual temptation in a relationship.

If you notice, I said, " reasonable boundaries," not the kind of ones that completely cut you off from socialization. We are all humans designed for relationships. No one was created a loner. We must interact with our environment, whether animate or inanimate.

Reasonable boundaries such as avoiding sex talks, not staying alone in the room, not hanging out in dark spots, and avoiding irresponsible dressing must be put in place and obeyed if you must overcome sexual desires in this perverse generation.


Thoughts redirection is an unavoidable requirement that can help avoid sexual temptations in your relationship. If you must put an end to sex and its temptations, learning how to shift thoughts must be an indispensable tool in your toolbox. 

fighting sexual temptation

What is thought redirection? Sometimes when we are alone, we become more vulnerable. We are tempted to do a lot. In such a state, Satan can easily take advantage of our weakness to put sex thoughts in our minds and paints sexual pictures in our imagination. When we sustain and ponder over these pictures, before long, we are tempted to call for sex.

 What we can do to fight sexual temptation at this point is to take our focus off sex thoughts and refocus it on some other thing of immense value to us. Someone said, " you cannot stop a bird from flying over your head, but you sure can stop it from building nests on your head." Don't allow the devil to build a nest full of sex and its devious promises on your head if you don't want to give in to sexual gratification.


Being careful of idle periods is one key way to help control sexual temptation in a relationship. This one follows closely to redirecting your thoughts. In getting rid of sexual desires, one must be aware of the danger of idleness. The popular saying, an idle mind is the devil's workshop is real. If you must deal with temptation in a relationship, you must limit the chances of leaving your mind unengaged or Satan will engage it with unhealthy thoughts.

If I were to advise, I would prefer you visit a friend or go to church, or just take yourself out on a date. Whatever you have to do to get busy just do it, but never you stay alone, all by yourself for too long.


In my opinion and from personal experience, the best way to have self-control sexually is to look on to Jesus. For me,  determination failed me, setting boundaries failed me because all along, I was doing it in the energy of the flesh. But when I met Jesus Christ and fixed my gaze on him, I was able to overcome sexual temptations effortlessly.

When we say we serve a living God, the world thinks it's a joke. It is not. Don't conclude a plate of meal is not delicious until you taste it.

In case you want God to help end your sexual desire, accept Jesus Christ into your life today by making this prayer and believing from your heart:

Father, thank you for sending your son Jesus to die for me. Jesus, I accept you into my heart today as my Personal Lord and saviour. Thank you for saving me and washing my sins away.


We don't avoid sexual temptation in a relationship alone. Even as singles, we must learn how to fight to get rid of dirty thoughts that could arouse our desire for sex. 

Due to deep sexual drives, many singles ask if it is possible at all to live life without indulging in premarital sex. Yes, it is. It is very possible to control sexual urges when single. From what we have seen so far, you are quite on the right route towards sexual purity. But there are a few other things you have to do as a single.

Here are a few things to do when sexually frustrated as a single.

1. Believe sexual purity is a possibility: Whatever the heart believes, it can achieve.

2. Be sold out to God: If you make a decision to serve God and obey his commandments, He'll give you the Grace to help reduce your sexual desire.

3. Develop self-love and high self-esteem: If you love yourself, it helps your determination to stay off sex and other things that can hamper your destiny. Check out the post, " Learning how to love yourself with confidence for self-happiness."

4. Be mindful of these things: Mind what you see, hear, feel or think because they decide your actions; The desire to have sex or fornicate is always triggered by these sources. To avoid sexual temptation you have to mind these things.


The question of how to resist temptation in a relationship is a frequently asked question for, especially men. Not that women don't, just that men are primarily wired for sex. They have a lot of biological seeds in them that seek daily release. This is why men are very sexual than women.

Another important thing to note about men is that they are driven by sight. A man can see a romantic scene in a movie or a magazine where a couple is kissing on a beach and comes back home feeling like having sex.

Sexual temptations can easily be avoided by men if they can control what they see. If you can get a man's eyes to focus on nonsexual things, you may likely always be the one to remind him of sex. This is the reason busy people don't have many kids. they are too busy to think sexual thoughts.

The key therefore to fighting sexual temptation in a relationship for men is keeping the eyes focused on things that don't trigger or provoke sex.

In summary, controlled sight and controlled thoughts are the two things men have to take note of when dealing with sexual longing.


You will always overcome being sexually frustrated as a man if you can control what you see as we've already established. This means, mind the movies you watch, the books or magazines you read, where you go and what you look at. You have to discipline your eyes when it comes to looking at hurt, sweet, sexy babes. 


Controlling one's sexual desire whether as a man or a woman, demands putting one's thoughts in check. One way to do that is to control what you see for the man. If your sights are controlled your thoughts can be controlled in a way.


For the woman, to resist temptation sexually she has to control what she hears. While a man is driven by sight, the woman is driven by emotions, and most times these emotions are built up from the words she hears.

There are three sides to a woman's quest to avoid sexual temptation in a relationship.


Emotion is the center of our feelings. Unfortunately, for women, emotions are too intense. Because women are for the most part too feeling-driven make them even more prone to sexual temptation. This is why while what a man sees is his biggest source of temptation, what a woman hears is her biggest source of sexual drive. If a woman must avoid the temptations to have sex as a single, she must guard herself against the deceptive words of a romantic man.



To stop sexual temptation as we already know, women must be careful with what they hear. But somehow, this is a difficult thing to do. While a man is primarily designed to be moved by sight, a woman was designed to be moved by what she hears. Asking a woman to avoid what pleases her is like asking a lion not to eat flesh. However, a woman who really wants to stay away from sexual temptation in a relationship must find a way to avoid what she allows her lover to tell her, especially when they are alone.


Everyone, whatever the temptation is, is saddled with the responsibility to control his or her thoughts. It is a general belief that our thoughts control our actions. If we want to avoid sexual temptation in a relationship, we must take note of this.

To get help with sexual temptation, we should first get help with controlling our thoughts.


The truth is, you can't get rid of sexual desire. If it is possible, many people will be doing it. You can't kill the desire to have sex. What you can do is control it. Many people have attempted to achieve this through medical means but suffer greatly as a result. 

There are many pitfalls in trying to get rid of the hormones that trigger our drive for sex. It is an interference with divine protocol.

Asking how to stop sexual desire permanently should not be the right question any sexually driven person should be asking, but how to reduce its chances of occurring. What we have dealt with so far will help with putting your high libido in check. 


These are my 7 easy ways to help avoid sexual temptation in a relationship. Anyone who seriously commits to these few steps will not only make progress but reach the end goal of overcoming sexual temptation for a fact. 



Healthy & Unhealthy Relationship:Signs,How To Leave,How To Build A Healthy One

How To Keep Yourself & Your Spouse From Cheating

Importance & Problems With Sex In Marriage|How To Enjoy Sex



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