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Friday, March 19, 2021

8 Risky Types Of Marriages You Should Never Venture | Find Out The Right Type

If you don't want to face intimacy problems, heartbreaks and dissatisfaction in marriage you must first decide the type of marriage you are getting yourself into. 


These days, people just chose a life partner out of the blues and expect to live happily ever after. Things don’t work that way. The truth is, the character of the person you get married to will define the kind of marriage you are in for and as well increase or decrease the quality of your life by 70 percent. A good reason to worry.


types of marriage


Finding the right person may not be easy but is the cheapest way out of heartbreak and marital/relationship frustrations.


I have put together this piece of article that will point you in the right direction. I have revealed 8 very dangerous types of marriages, as well as the type everyone who desires peace and bliss must seek to get into.


    ELECTRONIC MARRIAGE

Electronic marriage is what many people practice in this century. Needless to ask why many marriages are failing.

 

This type of marriage involves married couples who are also married to their phones, laptops and TV. The funny thing about it is couples are more committed to their second partner(electronic gadgets) than they are to each other. They are more attached to activities on social media than anything else.

 

The pitfall is, couples rarely make out time to satisfy each other's emotional needs and desires. They leave most of their responsibility to the maids and since they can't seem to be attached to the kids, the kids see the maids as their true friend, mother and confidant.

 

Many years ago when there were no electronics, couples gave each other maximum attention that resulted in the great bond, understanding and friendship that existed between couples then. 


    ROBOTIC MARRIAGE

This is another dangerous type of marriage. It can also be called fear-centered marriage.


This kind of marriage is a controlled-centric marriage where one person decides everything and the other must obey whether convenient or not. This is why I call it fear-centered marriage. Even when one is in disagreement with a decision, they don't air an opinion due to fear. There is no friendship or informality in this type of marriage. Everything is formal or official. You either do as I command or you get bitten or divorced.

 

This type of marriage is full of pretenses especially when visitors are around. Only smart visitors can easily notice the fake smiles, distanced hearts and artificial bonds between the couples.

 

In this marriage, Men are mostly the controllers, but these days, women have started controlling as well.

 

The danger of such marriage is that a time will come when the subject will rise up to challenge the controller which if not well managed can lead to domestic violence, death or divorce. Imagine what the children would have to face under such circumstances.


PICTURE PERFECT MARRIAGE

As the name implies, this marriage is only good on pictures. The last time they smiled and looked happy together was on their wedding day captured by a camera.

 

This type of marriage is so deceptive. Friends and families, including social media acquaintances, see frequent picture updates on Facebook, Instagram and Twitter signaling sweetness, peace, love, friendship and great bond which are far fetched from the truth. As far as pictures are concerned, this marriage is perfect, but in reality, it is full of regrets, depression, anxiety, hopelessness and suicidal thoughts. They are good actors but never happy couples.

 

People involved in this marriage, seldom invite people to their house for the fear of exposing the truth. They give unnecessary and countless excuses just to keep friends and families at arm's length.



DEFENSIVE MARRIAGE

This is the marriage where couples defend each other's wrong no matter what. To an extent and if well managed, it can be good but not without its own pitfall.

 

Couples in this marriage rarely see fault in whatever a partner does. If you have ever heard a mother complaining that his son supports the wise even when it is obvious she is wrong, then you have experienced defensive marriage.

 

In this type of marriage, relatives are not allowed to visit so to speak. However, anyone who decides to will end up being the only wrong person in the house because no matter what these couples do wrong, they don't see it as wrong. They blame others for everything and never accept their own mistakes.

 

The pitfall is too detrimental. Sooner or later, the children's wrong behaviors in school or in their social dealings with other kids will be defended. Be ready to also hire a lawyer to defend their crimes in court if you can't teach them to know their wrongs at home.

 

Another disadvantage is that the couples involved also extend such attitude to themselves. Nobody corrects each other and nobody learns from each other. They fight and quarrel but never accept defeats and faults. Issues are never settled in this marriage because nobody is willing to accept his or her mistakes. And because there is no learning, there is no changing. And since there is no changing, troubles persist.



  CAREER CENTERED MARRIAGE

This is the work-at-home type of marriage. In a bid to meet work targets, you bring your office jobs home sandwiching them in between domestic matters and when one partner begins to complain you hear something like, " This is what I do to put food on the table. All the cars, clothes and expensive trips you now  enjoy come from this work"

 

Providing for the family from your job is a fact that nobody can deny. Another higher fact is that you can't mix your official duties with your domestic responsibilities and expect peace and harmony. 

 

People who are too career-minded hardly make love to their partner, talk more of have time for the kids.


Other children's parents make out time to attend school events to watch their kids performance but not these parents.

 

The shortcomings of this marriage is that the more you give attention to your career and neglect everyone else, the more you lose them to other people who care. You will lose your partner to another person and you will lose your kids to another father/mother.



  SELF-CENTERED MARRIAGE

This sounds funny but some people are selfish in marriage.

There are men who go shopping and buy everything they need but don't buy anything for their wives or the kids. The only money they give to their wives is feeding money and it is in such a way that she can't squeeze out anything to shop for herself.

 

This is not just for men alone. Women are also very much guilty too. The only thing most women know how to give in marriage is sex because they think that is enough love. You hardly see a wife who spends on her man or trips him a bit. All they do is collect and spend. Any love that cannot be proved is no love.

 

Self-centered marriage is very dangerous. It opens up a space that someone else will begin to fill. It makes available that vacuum that only a partner should fill to others.


When care, practical love and giving is sieved off  a relationship, friendship, understanding and intimacy will miss while regrets and sadness will emerge.



KID-CENTRIC MARRIAGE

If you are in a relationship and someone says, " I'm not getting any younger. I want to get married and have kids " you have to be careful. That is a KID-CENTRIC PERSON. People with such a mentality don’t value marital bonds, friendship, commitment, and respect. As far as marriage is concerned, they see you as a slave helping them to fulfill their selfish ambition of making babies. 


Don’t expect such people to treat you specially because they won’t. You only get special treatment during pregnancy. In the case of a man, he is only treated specially during sex.


The worst of it all is when that baby is born, all care, love and attention are diverted to that child and you become almost non-existent. 



  SPOUSE-CENTRIC MARRIAGE

This is the opposite of kid-centric marriage. Unlike the kid-centric type of marriage, couples who are spouse-centric, focus on each other and care less about others including their kids. People who behave this way can decide to take weekend getaways for days not caring what becomes of their children.


 They are not sensitive to a child’s emotional state or instabilities and can’t tell the likes, dislikes, wants and desires of their children. This kind of marriage involves couples who hardly provide some other needs aside from food, shelter and school fees for the kids. They are much also less concerned about parents, relatives and friends. 



  THE RIGHT KIND OF MARRIAGE YOU SHOULD GET INTO


CHRIST-CENTRIC MARRIAGE

This is the only type of marriage you should get into. This marriage is defined by Jesus Christ and since Christ is love, this marriage is full of love, care, attention and peace.  It is a guided and guarded type of marriage.

 

One interesting thing about this marriage is, it is built on God’s standard so couples are not at liberty to act as they like. This marriage does not permit divorce so couples who fear and honor God’s principles and standards will never contemplate divorce.  You never experience heartbreak or any kind of dissatisfaction in this marriage. Misunderstandings do not escalate because they are easily solved. 


To enjoy this marriage, you must start by accepting Jesus into your life as your personal LORD and SAVIOUR and commit to obey His commandments. 


In case you want to make Jesus the Lord of your life, make this prayer and believe it. distance is not a barrier.



PRAYER OF SALVATION

Dear father, I come to you this day. I believe you sent your son Jesus Christ to die in my place and take my sins away. I believe in His death, burial and resurrection and I ask you, Jesus, come into my life and be my Lord and savior. thank you for the new life.




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