15 Smart Ways To Date Without Getting Into A Relationship

What To Do When He Doesn't WANT A RELATIONSHIP

Are you lost on what to do when he doesn’t want a relationship? Let me show you.   

If you are waiting for the right time for a man to be in a relationship, you may wait forever. The infamous expression, “ I’m not ready for a relationship now. I’m waiting for the right time” is not always true. That right time is a mirage. It may never come. What a woman should do in such a case is to learn what to do when he says he doesn’t want a relationship right now.   

Often when people make this statement, they are actually saying that you don’t have the right qualities they need even though you are at the right time. This is to say that people are always ready for a relationship. They just have not found the person with the right set of attributes they desire. In essence, it’s not always a question of “ right time,” but “right characters.”  

What Does It Mean When He Says He Doesn't Want To Commit?

When a man says he doesn’t want a relationship, it is what it is. It could mean that he is not ready to commit to any woman in lifelong bondage, they say. 

  It also means that he dislikes the idea of over-possessiveness, caging, being responsible for a woman, or being answerable to someone. Ultimately, it means that he desires the liberty to mingle with other girls. If he says he likes you but does not want any kind of serious relationship, it could mean he is a flirt.   

Check the post: A smart way to know a guy is a flirt.  

If He Says He Doesn't Want A Relationship Will He Change His Mind?

Hearing for the first time, “ I don't want a relationship” especially when you have begun to fall in love with him is heartbreaking. With the fear of losing your crush, you begin to ask, “ Is he going to change his mind?” “ Should I wait for him?” OR “ should I move on if he doesn't want a relationship?”   

Chances are that a man may likely change his mind. However, should not be forced to do it out of pity. That is a terrible mistake to make. You can't stand the future damage it may cause.   

A lot of things can make a man who is not ready for a serious emotional relationship change his mind.  Sometimes, it is not a question of the right time but the right character.   

Women who wear good character and who know how to responsibly attract a man can win his heart for a serious relationship.  I know guys and ladies alike, who initially were not ready for a relationship, but opted in somewhere along the line. Often when you ask them, they say that they didn't know how it all happened. But I know! just discovered the missing qualities they’ve been looking for. 

  

HE Desires A Casual Relationship? (IT'S A Common Experience)

  A few days ago, things were magical between you two. But shortly after, he tells you that he doesn’t want a serious relationship. Perhaps he even tells you he likes you but doesn’t want to take things further and deeper.    

Sometimes, a man may make up an excuse by saying that he just recently ended his relationship, and he begins to make unresolved statements like: 

 

1. Let's see how it turns out between us.
2. I don’t know what I want right now, but I still want to see you.

  

After which, you’re left with brokenness and disappointment, asking what offence you committed and what to do now.   

Sadly, such cases are too common nowadays. So smile. You are not alone and you did nothing wrong.

   

This Is What You Do When He Says He Doesn't Want A Serious Relationship?

  With all these said, what should you do when a man says he doesn't want a relationship?   

Some general questions may be popping into your mind, such as:

1.  How do you deal with a guy that doesn’t want a relationship?
2.  Should you try and get him to commit? 
3. Are there chances he will change his mind? 
4. Would it be better if I just walked away? 
5.  Should I just cut him off and let him go? 

  

In this post, you’ll find exact answers to these questions.   Below is what you can do when he says he doesn't want a serious relationship with you.  

1. Don't Doubt When He Says He Doesn’t Want A Relationship

  When a guy tells you that he doesn’t want a relationship, don’t doubt him. He could be telling the truth.    

It may not be that he doesn't really want a serious relationship at the moment. It could be that he doesn't want it with you.  He perhaps has not seen any quality or reason to desire a relationship with you.   

But if he truly means it, then it's a piece of serious information he disbursed to you.  Don’t force him. If you do, it might stand in the way of your own happiness. Don’t be a typical emotional woman who gets angry and becomes insistent.    

If you turn blind eyes to his need and cajole him into a relationship with you, right under your nose, he’ll cheat on you with the person he loves. That is the harsh reality. Don't take it personally.  

2. Enquire Why

  Often in dealing with the issue of relationship rejection, many counsellors will advise never to ask why. But that’s preposterous and immature.   

The very first reason you must strive to know the reason for his action is so that you don’t end things up with him unceremoniously. Don’t forget, sometimes, a reason can be genuine for an action.   

Secondly asking why, may also reveal an aspect of your behaviour you never knew existed, which probably fostered his rejection in the first place. With such a revelation, a sane woman could make appropriate adjustments in readiness for Mr Right.

 

3. Admit Your Understanding

  Just above, you admit your belief. Here, you will admit that you understand.   

If you are wondering what to say when a guy doesn't want a relationship, tell him you understand. This is a mature way of responding when a man says he isn't ready to commit.   

After you say, “ I understand,” Be quiet and wait for him. He will open up naturally explaining his reasons for not wanting a serious relationship.   

Why is this so important? When you say, "I understand," that’s a great relief to him.  Whenever he’s ready, you’ll run across his mind because he now perceives you as a mature and understanding adult. 

  

4. Don’t Stress Over It 

  It is important not to take it personally when a guy says he doesn’t want a relationship at the moment. Understand  It’s not about you.    

What most girls do is they begin to feel like the reason for his decision stems from the fact that they are not good enough for him. Or they’ve done something wrong. They hold tightly unto fear, anxiety, low self-esteem, and self-blame as a result.    

We've all experienced this at some point in our lives. I understand it can be very difficult. Your mind can't accept the truth that you’ve been rejected. Perhaps every guy out there practically worships the ground you walk on. But here is this dude saying he isn't ready to commit to you. This hurts even more, right? 

   Don’t ponder over that feeling of rejection. It’s really not rejection. Rejection is when a guy chooses another girl over you.   

You are not rejected. Instead, you are being turned over to a man that is right for you, who will make you happy.   

Despite how friendly, beautiful, smart or cool you are, it takes a genuine man to tell you he doesn’t want an affair with you. The least you can do is to appreciate such courage and openness.  

 

5. Be Clear Before Hand On The Kind Of Relationship You Want

  What kind of relationship do you desire? What type of partner do you want?  Are you desiring a serious emotional relationship or a casual, unattached one?   

Maybe you weren't clear before now. You assumed he wanted a serious relationship like you. Unfortunately, the reverse turned out to be the case. It is time to be as clear as possible and open up.   

As you clicked through this post, I assume what you desire is a serious relationship.  If that is the case, then getting into a casual relationship without a clear definition, only to hope for something more is a mistake. It will cause you worries, fears, and miseries. It could even waste precious years of your life and devalues your sense of self-worth and confidence.    

After reading this, endeavour to GET clear on what you really want. Set your deal breakers and don't hesitate to walk away from the wrong man.   

Related – 6 Types Of Relationships That Last Longer Than Expected & 18 Types That End Earlier Than Expected.  

6. Move On 

  Another thing you can do when he doesn’t want a relationship is to make up your mind to walk away.   

Sadly, cutting a guy off and walking away is easier said than done. I can relate to the overindulgent emotion of a woman. Even with a man, it's not very easy, talk more of a woman. It may take very long to fill that spot.     

Then, what do you do? How can you even attempt to get him to change his mind?  

Use the MIRRORING OR MIMICKING OR GAUCHAIS REACTION.  

7. MIRRORING TECHNIQUE

  Mirroring is simply responding to someone based on the way the person responds to you. It is mimicking someone’s action towards you and putting it right back in their face.   

In actuality, this means that you are only going to respond to and invest in him based on how he responds to and invests in you. For instance, if he messages you, you message; if he chats you up, you chat him up; if he requests a date with you, you oblige him. Don't ever do to him what he doesn’t do to you.   

The mirroring technique goes like this – if he reaches out and texts you, then you text him back. If he calls, then you call him back. If he asks you on a date, you can then go on a date. If he doesn’t take the relationship forward or show any significant interest, don't waste your time, energy and attention on him.   

Don’t ever anticipate his chats and calls. Don't reserve your weekend or special occasions expecting he shows up. 

   

8. Be Open To Date Other Men

  He doesn't want a serious relationship with you and so what! Keep Your options open and available. Accept other invitations. You are still single and available, so don't cage yourself because of the affection you feel for a man who’s totally unready.   

In addition to the mirroring technique we talked about,  It’s expedient you date other men, especially those who want the same thing as you: men that are totally available and in sync with your long term relationship goals and values. Those who always strive towards a better version of you and a golden relationship with you.    

When you deploy this dating approach, what usually happens is that he begins to desire you magically, or he fades away from your sight while you engage with more committed guys.   

Being Open to dating other guys is a smart thing to do when he doesn’t want a relationship.  

9. Ask Him To DTR

  DTR stands for Define The Relationship.   

But wait a minute, how can I ask him to define the relationship when he already said he doesn't want to commit?   

Point 9 is for those guys who clearly state what they want, yet act like they desire a serious relationship. There are guys like that who are lukewarm. They are at the midline between black and white. They are never decisive as to what they really want. Today they say, “I don't want a serious relationship,” and tomorrow, they call you, “ sweetheart, my love, my world.” They even send you lovely text messages and want your undivided attention.    

I know these are what women crave. But he can’t be acting all romantic and does not want a long-term serious relationship. 

This is why you have to ensure he is clear about the type of relationship he wants and ensure he respects it. Don’t let his attitude chase away potential life partners from you.  

10. Focus On You

  Another way to deal with a man that doesn’t want to commit is to focus on you. It is not selfish. It is self-love and everyone has that right.   

No man detests a confident woman who not only creates her own world but lives in it happily.    

Make up your mind to intentionally create a lifestyle that you actually enjoy living. A woman is worth too much and deserves all the happiness she desires than wasting away with a non-committal man.    

Your heart may be tempted to think about him, but refuse. Right under your duvet, think about how precious you are. Look yourself in the mirror and appreciate your beauty. Appreciate the fact that God chose you and preordained your existence even before you came. Invest your unfailing love in yourself through self-affirmation and self-appreciation.    

This is a clear recipe for what to do when he doesn’t want a relationship.   

Read- How to love yourself with confidence  

11. Understand You Are Worth It

  When a guy does not want a serious relationship with you, understand that you are worth your own happiness. Recognize that you deserve to have everything you want. If he says you can’t have him, then tell him he lost you.   

Make out time to get in touch with your outer and inner beauty and appreciate yourself for them. You are valuable and worth more than you think so don’t feel rejected. Have a positive disposition that the one special man that deserves you will come your way.   

What you are worth cannot be seen and known by others unless you show them. It is what comes from within.    

Many women are ignorant of this truth. When it’s a matter of love, for instance, they frequently bequeath their power to men who don’t even care. If care is not taken, they waste time, energy and sometimes money on these men.   

How do you start developing self-worthiness? Even though it’s an ongoing process, a good place to start is to scale up your dating standards and skyrocket your expectation in a realistic manner.   

12. Have Faith For The Flipside 

  Finally, to deal with someone who doesn't want a relationship, have faith on the flip side.    

Believe that though the date is finished, you are not finished. Men will come and go, but the right one will come and stay. And until that one comes, don’t kiss dating goodbye. Always keep yourself open. Fashion yourself, conduct and behaviour to meet responsible social standards, and the right guy will come knocking in no time.   

There are men out there who want to be in committed relationships. They want to fall in love, have a suitable couple, get married and raise families. There are a bunch of men out there that desire to desperately be the sugar that sweetens your tea. So keep your fingers crossed.    

Stop spending time in endless worries that it won’t happen. Don’t consider that age is no more on your side and so you want to quickly microwave yourself into the arm of a man by all means. You may end up with a beast who would leave your life worse off than he met it.    

Be patient. Exhibit boldness. Put on your queen’s attire and maintain a consistent, unpretentious lifestyle. Mr Right is just by the side NOTICING. 

These are what you must do when he likes you but doesn't want a relationship.    

PLEASE DO THIS FOR ME

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